top twenty local shows of 2005

[note: this list leans very heavily on the last few months because I have a terrible memory. It was also written in no particular order. Local bands are listed in bold and linked where possible]

1. the Walkie Talkies and There Must Be Others in some basement in Wicker Park-two awesome bands, although neither exist in the same way they did that night. Brigham left the Walkie Talkies to do derranged hiphop as the Minotaur and in three shows. There Must Be Others have had three lineup changes over the course of three shows. the only thing that remains consistent is that they really like to destroy baby dolls.

2. Sin Orden, Condenada, 30/30 and Cinder at Juevos Ranchos - Sin Orden reunited and are here to stay!!! Hit me Back played that night and blew. Stay on the West Coast, Hit me Back.

3. Chicago Fest at Pulaski Park Fieldhouse with No Slogan, Condenada, the Repos , Riistetyt, and over 20 other hardcore bands - this was the only hardcore show this year that came close to 2004's "Ratas de Ciudad" warehouse release party

4. Lozenge, Remember the Maine, and the Coughs at Mr. City - the best show of autumn. I hadn't seen Lozenge since the Nervous Center closed and I'd been falsely informed that they'd broken up. They were amazing. My tricycle was stolen earlier that night so by the time I left I was raging drunk. On my way to a party I wandered into a gallery space off Western/Milwaulkee/Armitage featuring a number of largesize (7' by 5') paintings of nude, older women (40s-60s), in war scenes brandishing weapons. The band that was playing had no name. Unfortunately, they had come together to jam for that night and that night only. The music was this psychedelic soup of reggae and hiphop. I wish I could see them again.

5. G.O.A.T., Satan 3000, Mister Fuckhead and the Machinist at 3030 (followed by the last show at Camp Gay, I don't know who was playing but it was I believe three bands at the same time and it was the shit)

6. Typewriter and the Mathematicians at Texas (the people living/working at Texas were real assholes that day; whoever says that the City of the Future festival was devoid of people who thought they were bringing culture to Bridgeport did not have to deal with these Wicker Park expat divas. I'm glad the cops shut their shit down...also Typewriter is the shit)

When my friends couldn't get into this show we wandered down the street to a house calling itself "the house of the future." This house used to be in Bridgeport but because of redistricting, I think it's in Pilsen. Anyway, these guys have lived here for years throwing awesome parties and pig roasts and shit. They're a bunch of class acts and they know how to throw down. The bonfires were lovely. The crowd was sophisticated and some band, I believe they were called Model Rocket Scientists, rocked my ass.

7. V8, Vyle, the Minotaur, K to the I, Bryzowsky, Radioninactive at Gunther Murphys- it was awesome to see a tri-coastal hip hop show. the minotaur sucked that night but has been getting progessively better all year. When he played the Mutiny with Indian Jewelry and the Electric Set on Halloween, he was much better, awesome in fact.

8. Lord of the Yum Yum with Dan Deacon and a million and a half noise bands at the Fireside Bowl - I always love Lord of the Yum Yum but this was the first time I saw him where most of the crowd "got" him.

9 Ellissa P and Brenmar Someday at 3030 - Two people bump into each other: Hey! You got jarring noise in my well crafted piano pop! No, you got pop in my ethereal soundscapes! brilliant!

10 Gays in the Military and Panicsville at the Empty Bottle (Bloodyminded is terrible!)

11.Ejercito Sin Son, 30/30, Crimenes de Guerra, and a rockabilly surf band at the Crevice (I miss that spot) - ska en espanol? si!

12. Intifada with Religious Sex and Caustic Christ at the Albion House (actually, any show at the albion house)

13. Small Change (live band hiphop) with a bunch of SxE bands at a gallery in West Town. So after a couple bands have these long tyrades against alcoholism, meat-eating and religion ("fuck Buddhism"), Small Change comes out and one of the emcees, completely oblivious, asks, "You know what's good? Beer. Beer makes you strong. You drink beer and you can fight anybody," before tearing in.

14. Quasar Wut Wut at Redmoon's "Sink, Sank, Sunk" at the Jackson Park Lagoon - funk band on a boat! funk band on a boat!

15. Debase, Soft Serve, Condenada and others at the Beauty Shop - I got trashed and had to leave early; Debase kicks ass for a high school punk band

16. the Coctails at Rotofugi - free show! singing saw! toy store! ...SENSORY FUCKING OVERLOAD!!!

17. Apartment Burlesque Orchetra's last show with Marvin Tate, Miss VonLivid and others at the DANK Haus. Apartment was the band that got me into the whole cabaret freakout scene five years ago when I saw them at the Fireside Bowl with Novasonic Down Hyperspace (who are now a shittier band with a better name) and My So Called Lice (who stand out as the worst band I have ever seen live). At the time the bass player was doing The bass lines with a tuba which was enough for me, plus I was in love with their cellist and their singer Caila was doing this geek/stripper/spazz theatrical routine, and less singing than reading poetry (sometimes very bad poetry). When she left town for a bit, Marvin Tate became the singer, he had a really commanding James Earl Jones-as-a-filthy-minded-preacher thing going for him and did a lot of poetry himself. He was the singer for one of my favorite local funk groups, Marvin Tate's D-Settlement (which featured Articles of Faith drummer Spyder!) . When Apartment didn't have a singer they were usually scoring a burlesque show or experimental film. They will be missed.

18. The John Cage Musicircus w/ Environmental Encroachment, Princess, and hundreds of others at the Museum of Contemporary Art.

19. Radiant Darling at Burkhart Studios. I could look at Ami Saraiya all day, and I could listen to the song "Familiar" for weeks on end.

20. Stag Party at the Elks Lounge. The Elks Lounge is my basement in Ukranian Village. Every now and then I throw a massive party and weird stuff happens. Over the summer, I was in a Manifest Theatre spectacle in the Wicker Park park with Stag Party's singer, Gabe. To raise money to build a giant mastodon puppet, Stag Party played a fundraiser at my house. It was more than a little great.

Honorable mentions:
- Bobby Conn at a puppet show Reversible Eye in Humbolt Park
-Chicago Summerdance DJ nights - all of them
-Hannibelectro and Gabriel G. at the Elks Lounge
-hip hop with live drum and bass at the Darkroom (I don't know the performers name, it was a Mondo Exhibition. Why don't I know this awesome fat rapper's name?)
-C.H.A.O.S. Fest at Nihilist - shit went crazy. was supposed to be at Texas but the cops kicked us out, then the cops showed up again, but just stood around shaking their heads
-AIDS Wolf and Panicsville at Enemy - This show was only the shit because of AIDS WOLF. I missed Carlos Gioffinni, I already listed Panicsville, and Bloodyminded still suck
-I-ATTACK, World Inferno/Friendship Society, the Subhumans and crappy East Coast hardcore band at the Logan Square Auditorium - an amazing show and I-Attack played the best set I've ever seen them play but it was not really a local show

R.I.P. 3030*, Buddy Gallery**, Burkhart Studios, Camp Gay***, the Crevice, Schizoclub, the Needlehouse, the Command Center, 556/Mestizo, El Colibri, Bottom Lounge and the Lakeview Lounge

*Which is soon to be putting on shows again as Elastic Arts (which, I believe, was the name they went by when it opened)
**now putting on shows as Happy Dog
***I believe there are some Camp Gayites holdin it down at a spot called Magical Forest but I ain't been there so I don't really know